I can't believe I did this...

Last Friday night/Saturday morning, I camped out for a chance at getting tickets to Saturday Night Live's season finale (Steve Carell from The Office, John McCain, and Usher). It was fun, but one of the craziest/stupidest things I've done in a LONG time. Friday, we were in class 8:30-1 and then had two deadlines to meet that afternoon. We also had to be in class Saturday morning by 9. What were we thinking...



This is the group of girls: Mary Catherine, Molly, Debs, and yours truly. James and Chris were also with us. And yes, we did get in to the dress rehearsal. It was fun, but it was a pretty dirty episode. Hope they cut some of the nasty stuff out of the real show. Steve Carell is so talented. It was exciting to see John McCain and hey, he's got guts to appear in New York and poke fun of his age on SNL. Usher, um, he is talented and a very attractive man. I think it would be wise for me to leave it at that or I'll run into a rant.

New York is wonderful. I'm blown away by how many opportunities there are here. I'm blessed to live in a "big" city, but I feel like it's a map dot compared to New York. I'm also humbled every day through subtle and not-so-subtle reminders of how much I have to learn - and it's not just journalism.

New York is also cold. I should have brought something other than a sweatshirt and a blazer. (Thank you, Kate! You've seriously aided my professional image..hah.)

Okay, off to keep writing stories. Currently pondering, sorting through, and working on a New York piece that required me going out into a totally unfamiliar place and approaching and interviewing complete strangers. Loved it. (Isn't that crazy? I've never minded talking to complete strangers, but I thought being in an unfamiliar city might really throw me a huge curve ball.) I just wish I had another day or two to better craft my story...but hey, that's always my thought on pretty much every story.

Faulkner and Oral Tradition

Before written languages, the only way to remember people was through oral tradition: the telling of stories passed from one generation to the next. Men sought an epic quest, whether through a journey, battle or pursuit of a villain, and hoped that the story of their conquest would immortalize them after their death. While they would not continue to dwell on earth in their physical bodies, they hoped to live on through stories of their successes. A life without any stories of triumph meant disgrace because there would be no remembrance of the man after his death.

William Faulkner’s The Bear exhibits the characteristics of such a story. The tale describes a band of men who seek Old Ben, a legendary and almost invincible bear. While Faulkner’s loaded, winding sentences prove difficult to read on paper, they are well-crafted examples of the oral tradition style.

The hunters show fierce dedication and competitiveness, sharing camaraderie in their common goal to finish off Old Ben. Refusing to back down from an animal that has escaped death at least fifty-two times (by bullets alone), the men demonstrate unshakeable determination. They vow that they will break him, conquering him and all others that have failed in their attempts.

Today, everyone still wants to be remembered after his death. Instead of living lives of self-focus, men should seek a quest aiding others, like the group of men in Faulkner’s story. There is no glory in being remembered for things done for self-gratification.

Gay Telese's Epic Story (Frank Sinatra Has a Cold)

If today’s celebrity profiling/entertainment writers wrote their articles like Gay Talese did, I might keep up with celebrities; not to follow the subject matter of the article, but to simply to enjoy the way the stories would read because of a masterful author.

Talese revolutionized journalism through his literary style. He employed a storytelling method instead of a hard news reporting and yet he also incorporated classical literary devices into his writing. In Frank Sinatra Has a Cold, Talese begins the story in medias res, Latin for “into the middle of things.” This is exactly how Virgil begins his epic poem The Aeneid. Talese shows his brilliance by placing a classical literary element into an article that reads just like an epic story.

I couldn’t put down Talese’s story. His elegant sentences, clear observations and his conversational and storytelling measures make the story personal. Instead of reading an article about Frank Sinatra – a man whom I know very little about – I felt like I was there observing Sinatra with Talese. I became so caught up that I forgot I was reading.

Today’s journalists focus heavily on hard news and quick stories planned and written after one or two interviews with a celebrity. By following Sinatra around, listening to him, paying attention to the small details and research, Talese seems to capture Sinatra’s essence in his article. It is not another boring article about a celebrity rear-ending another SUV; it is a well crafted, clearly written work, worthy of multiple re-readings.

Reconsidering chaos: My world versus Rwanda's genocide

Reading Philip Gourevitch’s We wish to inform you that tomorrow we will be killed with our families (punctuation is as appears on the book’s cover), makes the word “chaos” take on a completely different meaning.

Recently I’ve used the word “chaos” to describe a various number of things, mainly my lack of a set schedule due to exams, moving back home and searching for a job.

Gourevitch uses the word “chaos” to illustrate genocide – something very different than my portrayal of the word. Through his own words and the words of his sources, Gourevitch clearly indicates that there is more to chaos than my definition.

Dr. Eliel Ntaki used the word “chaos” to avoid using “genocide”, describing chaos as “every man for himself.” Pastor Elizaphan Ntakirutimana also substituted “chaos” for “genocide.” After saying Jesus is the only one who can take away hatred and sin, he closed with, “Everything is chaos.”

Reading the book during one of the busiest times of my semester, I realized that contrary to how I felt, my life was not chaos. I was chasing my studies, not being hunted down because of my ethnicity. I was tired because of studying, not because I was on the run for my life. I was hurting from lack of sleep, not because I had been beaten, raped and left for dead.

After finishing the book, I felt as if there were truly no words in the English language to describe what has happened in Rwanda, but perhaps Gourevitch’s exposition on “chaos” is the closest possible definition.

Handling grief: The Shawl & Cindy Sheehan

Words cannot express how thankful I am to have a normal immediate family, specifically a normal mother who doesn’t obsess over the past and live in a state of frenzied grief.

That was the first thought that entered my mind after completing Cynthia Ozick’s The Shawl. Ozick’s tale portrays a woman named Rosa during and following the time of the Nazi reign. Rosa witnesses a Nazi guard murdering her daughter Magda and the incident scars her for the remainder of her life. She continues to live in the past, shows odd signs of grief (destroying her store and needing Magda’s shawl), and refuses to let anyone into her life.

As I read, I kept thinking, “Get over it! Move on and finish grieving!”

Then I realized that I hadn’t been through anything close to this traumatic. Strangely, my memory jumped to Cindy Sheehan, the mother of a soldier killed in Iraq in 2004.

Mrs. Sheehan claims that her son died "for nothing," taking extreme measures trying to prove her point. She lost her marriage and funds and many questioned her sanity because of her decisions.

I’m sure it’s difficult to let go and to finish grieving over events with such a magnitude as losing a loved one – especially a child – whether from the Holocaust or the war in Iraq. While I don’t agree with either woman’s methods or madness in grieving, I have no reference point for dealing with such an event. I can’t help but wonder how such an event would impact my own life and how I would handle such grief.

Write about yourself...in 100 words

So I cheated the system a little bit and made this over 100 words. I didn't think I would have any trouble writing my bio for WJI, but it was really hard for me to stick to such a short amount of words! Guess I need to work on being brief...being an English major has trained me to expound upon everything that I know while being a Journalism major has trained me to keep it short and sweet and still get the point across adequately. 

(The assignment was to write a 100 word bio, including journalism background and goals. Try it sometime and see if you go over, too.)

I’m a rising junior from Memphis, Tenn., studying journalism and English at Mississippi State University. I’m a news/online writer and photographer for our campus newspaper. I took newspaper courses in high school, gaining writing, photography and editing experience. I’ve freelanced with The Commercial Appeal and will do so again this summer. 

I plan on attending graduate school and hope to work with a newspaper or magazine, possibly focusing on non-profit and pro-life agencies.

As a Christian, I’m called to seek truth and share it with the world. I can think of no better profession for doing so than journalism.

See, just a glimpse...I guess I just want people to know more about me than just a blurb of 100 words. I thought about making it a string of random thoughts...like so: 

I'm on a first name basis with several of the AT&T hotline phone technicians because I've been through six or seven cell phones in two years. (Honestly, I take really good care of them, but they just stop working!) I've been in the PCA since I was six. I've never been on a roller coaster - just the thought of riding one scares me. I've lived in Memphis all my life and have never been to Graceland, but I've visited Graceland Too in Holly Springs, Miss. at least four times! I have a Mac and I'm never going back. I have arthritis and can't find my wrist brace at the moment...really hoping it's still packed in one of my boxes from moving back home from college. I have a learning disability that is frustrating but has taught and forced me to work hard in many aspects of life, especially school. I'm incredibly afraid of heights. I wouldn't dive into water or light a match until I was about 11. (Not sure exactly why. I guess I was scared?) I don't mind if you ask me questions about being adopted; in fact, I love telling people! I'm named after my great grandmother, and yes, if you forget my name, I'll answer to Audra, Aubrey, Audrey, Auburn, even Anna, but I would love it if you could remember my name. I think beautiful buildings, especially old churches, are wonderful. Probably 70 percent of my wardrobe is blue. I use guy's deodorant because it works better. I can't memorize to save my life. My jaw is completely out of alignment and I have TMJ, but I still love smiling, even though it's very crooked. I love my Trinity Hymnal. You'll be my new best friend if you can make me laugh. I have the most incredible family and home church in the world. I love going to a huge SEC school and I don't feel like I'm simply a number at a school of 16,000 (-ish) students. I love being from the South. Yes, my hair is naturally that curly and no, I've never colored it. Instead of reading me bedtime stories or singing to me, my daddy read my the children's catechism at night before bed (starting the day I came home for the first time!). I have Raynaud's, so it's okay/normal when my fingers and toes turn death blue or blood red. I'm incredibly allergic to MSG. I think it's really sad that Russians don't have/don't eat peanut butter. I'm a major night owl and can function for days with no sleep.

Okay, that's definitely enough and way more than anyone wants to read. Someone else needs to give bio writing a try while I keep reading my books and writing my other essays!

P.S. Got to attend a Derek Webb/Sandra McCracken concert in Memphis last night at Otherlands. They're incredible. If you're looking for new music, check them out.

I want to do anything but study

I realize this isn't a "thoughtful" post, but it will be awhile before I can sit down for some time to really think about things going on...

I'm nearing the end of my semester. It's crazy that I'm almost finished with my sophomore year. I still remember being the confused, lost freshman on a campus with countless buildings and a study body of around 16,000. Where has the time gone? Have I used it wisely? What do I have to show for my two years here? Where have I invested myself and do I need to continue those investments for my remaining two years? Where have I spent my time to further the Kingdom? What investments have helped me grow in my walk with the Lord? What investments have I made to serve others and make a difference in their lives? 

I keep telling everyone that I can't wait for summer and honestly, I'm really excited about it: family, New York, freelancing, maybe a new job, home church, reuniting with best friends, reading for enjoyment and not for school, being back in a big city. Despite all these things, it hit me last week how much I'm going to miss the things at school: all my incredible friends, RUF, the wonderful girls in community group, core group, random walks around campus, late night "exploration expeditions" of campus, staying up ridiculously late for various reasons, meeting new people, music team, 525, being able to walk almost anywhere that I need to go. I felt the same "torn" feeling going in to last summer, but I was really almost too busy at home last summer to think about feeling torn between the two places.

Anyway, moving on to this week. Maybe posting all this will help me get my thoughts together and relieve some stress of having it all in my head? 

Today: Missed first class because I overslept. I think this is the first time that's ever happened. Met with a professor for help with one of the 10-page papers. Now on to writing newspaper interview questions, calling sources, setting up interviews; studying for cumulative AP Style test and current events quiz (last one of the year!); start Latin word list/final; work on two 10-page papers

Tuesday: The test and quiz; meet with a professor to get double major dropped to a single major (hooray!); continue with article, Latin, and papers

Wednesday: Latin quiz; college's cookout (serving); RUF banquet for the seniors (serving); studying like mad for an exam the next day

Thursday: 19th Century British Novels final exam; continue working on papers and Latin; study for Mass Media test; meet with a professor about the first paper; meet with the Writing Center to have a tutor examine said paper; RUF luau party/Suicidal Margarine farewell concert (I'm sad to think that I'll probably be missing that last event for the second year in a row)

Friday: One paper due; Mass Media test; Latin list/exam due; run a friend around town; keep writing my last paper of the semester

This week is going to be difficult, but so will everyone else's (probably?), and hey, it's life. (And all this makes exam week look a LOT better.) And as several sweet friends have reminded me, God is always faithful to give me the strength to complete everything that He has called me to do (even if it means not sleeping for a few nights).